Two weeks

Wow...has it been that long ???

Last 2 weeks had been crazy. First there was all that jittery about finding the perfect maid (where got such thing rite???). I've even looked all the way to Myanmar -as found the girls working at a neighbourhood shop to be exceptionally good & well behaved. At last, in order not to piss off the agents further for being indecisive, got to settle for a missy from our neighbouring country down south. Cross fingers!

Secondly, due to my own big mouth when met an ex-colleague - "eh, got job or not?" which was actually seriously just a reflex reaction from me only - he sent over 2 head hunters! So that would be juggling and making time to meet up with 2 head hunters and attend 3 interviews - which was no joke considering no maid to babysit the boys for a while.

Last but not least, getting this & spending the whole afternoon waiting for the delivery man to fix it up. Daddy & Mommy were hoping to entice Di-Di to sleep in the next room with Kor-Kor. After a week, still not successful. Up to the point that mommy has to go over & sleep (mommy don't mind actually, only Daddy thinks mommy is spoiling the kids)!

But Kor-Kor really loves it! And Di-Di really loves the idea of it!!!

Cut Queue

Today, when I went to pick up Di-Di, the first thing his teacher said was "Yr son told me today that mommy cut queue when paying money. He said this when I asked him to stand in line & don't jump queue!"

I was flabbergasted, speechless & so, so, so embarrassed!

Thank god I didn't have to stand there and be embarrassed further by her expression, as it was pick-up rush hour. I quickly racked my brain to see when did I set this bad example.

Not that I know of. May be...subconsciously, or does cutting queue while driving thru traffic lights count ? (What to do, need to get them to school in time mah. We are always 5 to 10 minutes behind time...)

I quickly asked Di-Di to explain why he told his teacher I cut queue.

"Mommy...got. That day ah..."

"Which day? Where got?????" Still in denial mode.

"That DAY, sar-sar ma-lam (pasar malam or nite market). Jelly!!!" Getting frustrated with mommy.

Rummaged thru tons of undone housework in brain again. "OOOHHHH...when I paid for the jelly, instead of letting u pay hor!"

"Yes, u cut queue....!!!!"

I have given Di-Di RM1 to pay for the jelly. But after all the hoo-haa of them choosing color, I unintentionally paid instead. Might have said something like ooops, cut queue! Sorry!

Like that also 'chong ciu' (Cantonese slang for striking the opposite of lottery). That lil' monster! There's really no telling what they retain in their heads for their uses at later date.

But I gotta admit, its kinda funny:)

Quiting Habit

I really don't want my son to grow up a quitter. But sometimes, I feel that I still need to cut him some slack - cos I'm not really sure whether he was interested to take it up in the first place. Or did he take up due to ahem... my 'strong' suggestion/cajoling.

However, sometimes, I stand my ground. Adamant he continues. Or at least... plotting for a way for him to continue.

The thing is, since early this year, Kor-Kor has quited on 2 things.

First, he quited on his kung-fu class (something like wu shu). One of my friends who has a son of same age with Kor-Kor, suggested that it might be fun for them to try this out, since it was not expensive; and didn't need to buy expensive uniforms like tai-kwan-do or karate. Initially both the boys hit it off, so he enjoyed the class. But six months down the road, he started complaining that he didn't like my friend's son la, didn't like the class la, got other boys punched him la, etc. So after 1 year, when he started Std 1, I finally gave up too (it was also getting more & more difficult to drive him there bloody early on Sat morn too!).

Secondly, he quited on his music class. But this one, the music teacher was partly to blame, disappearing numerous times for one or two months, for the 2 years he was teaching my son. How to keep up the interest rite? Anyway, Kor-Kor finally drew the line when he knows that his mommy is staying at home and should be taking him to playground instead. I let him win this one, plotting instead to get him & Di-Di to do this together when Di-Di is ready, haha!

Then...he wanted to quit swimming class. I started him on swim lessons last year end long hols. The first 10 lessons dragged out to beginning of this year cos it was usually raining in the evening, or else, either, we or the instructor had other things to attend.

For this one, I admit...I'm the pushy mom, he was not that keen in the first place. But then, the 2 of them always like water (& we like beach hols) & Kor-Kor has no qualms about jumping into the deep end. For me, that's a major problem, cos i need to really closely watch them. So it would help if they know how to swim. (Also, the doc says Kor-Kor has asthmatic tendencies, so swimming would help to strengthen his lungs.)

He was okay for first one or two lessons. Then the complains started. Lesson boring la. He already know how to swim la (he knows how to move a bit, yes! but still looks dangerously like drowning in deep end). Don't like instructor la. And the most classic - instructor fat la & he doesn't like fat people la!

Aiyoyo, I nearly fainted.

But for this one, I plotted & negotiated. The instructor....or ME! I would teach....

...Very reluctantly! Know why, cos I know Kor-Kor would be giving me a lot of 'attitude' that would drive me insane! And it would not do to throttle my son in front of a pool of strangers! (Its ok to do it at home when nobody can see, but not in public view, rite?)

But I'm happy to report that we have been doing this for 6-7 times already (progressing very slow), and Kor-Kor is still in one piece, though he really did pull out all the punches man...like running la, making faces la, talking nonsense la, giggling la. Deep yoga breathing really helps!

Though I must admit I did squeeze his thigh really hard once or twice (thigh under water, not noticeable), grab his arm roughly to drag him back (must stop when I saw other mommies eyeing at me), threathening to send him back to the instructor (he prefer me, dunno why), threathening to cut his tv time, etc.

The best is still rewards. For breast stroke hands & legs coordination, I really need him to concentrate, so his reward for doing correctly is Ben 10 Alien Force series, episode by episode. He now got episode 1-4 on hand already, so I think can buy 1 disc...

If anybody thinks I've a screw loose, in my defence, I actually don't plan to do this for long (don't plan to age before my time). I'm just the interim instructor, my plan is to send him to another instructor, who is not fat, haha!

Undomestic Goddess

U know the book, Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella. Though I think the book is a tiny wee bit far fetched, I still kinda enjoyed it.

Becos...I really, really CAN relate to the heroine. I really, really suck BIG time at household chores & cooking!!!!

2 days after my maid ran away, I knew I couldn't put it off any longer...I would need to mop the floor.

Just thinking about it makes my back ache already. So I did what any sane person would do. Go buy a really high tech mop (though we have several already ie the conventional ones, the flat longish one which I'm not very sure whether its a mop or for dusting, the yellow stripe fibre ones).

But hey, why stop at one, why not buy 2 at that, 1 for upstairs & 1 for downstairs.

Still after a day on my own (1st day got Daddy to help out) running about after the boys, sweeping, mopping, washing clothes, etc, I not only got back ache. Leg very pain as well - can hardly walk by night time!

Then there's all that episodes of blanking out. No, not fainting. Just old age forgetfulness. So far I have burned the soup (forgot to turn off gas when re-heating the soup, resulting in charcoal black old cucumber...which I didn't force the boys to eat, in case anyone think I did:), forgot to cook rice (until eating time), forgot to boil water, forgot to turn the water on for the washing machine to work, forgot to take in the clothes, forgot whether to put in garlic or onions or both....(u get the picture).

However, I also conveniently forgot to take out the trash. And forgot to iron the clothes. So that Daddy would do it mah! (Sneaky good, rite ?)

The upside is that the boys now do not seem so helpless & manja (whinny) already. Though previously, I did ask the maid not to do everything for them, she still did cos its actually easier than yelling at them. Though now I still do need to remind them (IN A LOUD VOICE), they'll do it quicker. Not so many delay tactics. And they get it now that the floor don't eat rice - not so messy.

Di-di also doesn't cry anymore when I scold him. Previously, I'm the bad guy & he'll go running to the maid to whine & cry. Now he got nobody to run to, hahaha!

But still, it's very, very, very tough...being down-graded from 'tai-tai' (I like to tell people that...more glamour though I don't always go out 'yam cha'/shopping/spend money) to full fledge HOUSEWIFE!!!!

(I think my brain is still not processing 'me being alone without help' so well!):P

Dramatic Maid

This is going to be my one & only post about my domestic helper a.k.a...maid. (Since this blog is supposed to be about my 2 lil monsters mah.. and sometimes me... NOT HER!). Just want to send this out 'here' as a reminder to myself not to be SO gullible in the future, as well as a warning to those who came by this.

My maid, her name is G, from Philippines, & she has been with us 7 months. She's hardworking, looks honest & seems to love my 2 boys. My previous one, M, was also from Philippines & was with us since Di-Di was born till he was 3 years old. M was very efficient & I didn't have to worry a thing while working long, long hours.

Though G was a bit blur comparatively & will go a bit panicky if got too many things on hand, I still thot we were quite lucky to have her. However, one month down the road, she received a text mesg from hubby. Seemed that her hubby got into accident & broke his leg. Can't go to work. No money to eat & for medicine. No money for daughter to go school. So we sympathised & sent RM500 back for her, when in actual fact, we didn't have to give her salary yet as we have paid her 4 months' salary in advance to the agent as fees for bringing her over.

We continued sending RM500 monthly for the subsequent two other months, as the hubby texted that he was still out of work.

Then, more family tragedy followed. Her father passed away, on the first day of our Chinese New Year Celebration at that! We felt very bad for her, so we sent for her RM1,000, with RM500 as 'pak kam' (condolence money to help with the funeral cost).

Though there was no tragedy in Feb, came Mar, like clockwork, her hubby texted again, that he was still not working as his leg has not fully recovered & he needed more money for food, medicine, schooling fees. We should have suspected then, but G does not look like the type who would tell such big lies. So again, I sent RM500 as advance of her salary back home for her.

Then one & hf weeks ago, I received text mesg from her hubby informing her that their home was burglarised, & they lost their appliances, food & money. By now, Daddy & I had already decided to give her RM500 as advance salary each month (& used the balance of her salary to slowly pay us back for the first 4 months' advances we paid the agent). So we are ok then to send RM500. But she wanted additional RM150 to help out her mom & promised this is one time thing only. So gullible me, gave her RM650 this time around.

Just when I thot things could not get any worse, this Tues past, I received text mesg that her 7-year old only daughter has been hospitalised & was in critical condition. After her call back to her sis-in-law, she came running to me, (beating her own head like a craze person) telling me thru her wails that her sis-in-law informed that her daughter had got denggi & now got 50%-50% chance of living only. I told her to call again to talk to her hubby as her sis-in-law could have exaggerated. I mean, denggi only mah, here the chances of pulling thru is higher, rite ? And quit that crying.

She called again. Her hubby didn't want to talk to her, too upset wor. This time, her sis-in-law told her, the doctor said her daughter would probably not live thru the week. G started beating her own head again, so I told her to go downstairs to calm down.

I called the agent to find out what next I should do. I also told him all the money we sent. Ok, the gist from the agent was 'chances of her stories being true were as high as I strike the Big Sweep'! (But her drama really real le, honest!)

The agent said he would 'kau tim' (take care of it) & asked me to bring her over on Thursday so that he can 'talk' to her. This also meant I gotta suffer her crying spree for another 2 days - she begged to be allowed to go home for a week or two. Dead or alive, she'll be back here, as she needed the money (I actually thot of doing that, but the agent says if she goes home without cancelling her contract, we are screwed ie penalised, if she did not come back (as he needed her passport to do the 'cancel the contract' paperwork).

But I told her I'm not sure of the process, and we are to check out the procedure with the agent. I also found that I still want to believe her, cos being a mother, lying that your daughter is at near death is NOT a thing to do.

Come Thurs, the agent tried to get his local contacts to get hold of her hubby, but he was nowhere to be found as he supposedly lost his hand phone in the burglary. In the meantime, the agent tried one of the numbers G said was her sis-in-law (nos from the few text mesg. I received) and asked for the hospital that the daughter was in. While waiting, the agent told G that if it's true, her daughter has denggi, he would fly both the hubby & daughter over here for treatment. When G heard, she cried harder still, insisting this can't be done & she wanted to go home for a short while only. And for the first time, bells were ringing furiously in my head, cos if I'm her, I'll be jumping with joy. Right ?

Then, the agent managed to get hold of the sis-in-law again. She tried to give him a hand phone number, said its the doctor. The agent insisted on having the hospital's. She sounded very hesitant. He then insisted to talk to the hubby. She said she can't get hold of the hubby as he sold his phone to pay for his daughter medical treatments. (Hey, hold on, didn't he lost his phone in the burglary!!!) He then asked how long was the daughter in the hospital already. The SIL said a week. (Hey, hold on again, wasn't it only last week their house burglarised. There was no mention of daughter in hospital then!!!)

With that, I cannot take it anymore & left for a cup of coffee. When I came back, the agent said he 'kau tim' already. He suspected the hubby was stringing G along, hoping to squeeze as much money out of her or us, as possible. He said after being caught at a few bullshits, the sis-in-law admitted that the daughter, though hospitalised, is suffering from dehydration, not denggi & that the daughter was fine after treatment.

G was to continue with us & finish her contract, moreover she needed to repay us for all those 'advances'. But throughout journey home, she continued wailing saying that the agent lied & that her daughter is still hospitalised. She said the agent roughed her up & threatened her life if she still brings the issue up.

I can then see that it was gonna be a long, long, long, long... months ahead WITH HER, if she continues to act like this....

To cut the story short, we went out for dinner (without her, as cannot stand her wailing) when we came back, she was gone...

I admit I'm not a saint employer (as I tend to have 'certain' standards), but with her gone, not only we lost a lot of money (a lot... cos we are not covered for replacement after 6 months), the worst is that we...I...felt like the BIGGEST SUCKER OF THEM ALL!