Datin Life in Jakarta/Bandung

Not many weeks ago, this mommy and her girlfriends conned ourselves some free food & lodging in Jakarta. And we were so lucky - free transportation were thrown in as well.

Well, actually we invited ourselves to a long-lost friend's bachelor pad, arm-twisted for a couple of meals and we were actually so entertaining that he let us make use of his car & driver while he was buried underneath tons of paperwork at office.

Shopping with car-cum-driver is SO different. No need to go round & round looking for a parking space! Once done, just call for the driver to pick us up at the main entrance, similar to Jakartarian upper-middle class, minus their bling-bling! Then, Mr. Driver will just whisk us to another shopping mall. Like fairy godmother. Like we really dig this datin lifestyle!

I was really at awe with the size of their shopping malls. Plaza Indonesia / Grand Indonesia (2 adjacent buildings) makes Mid Valley/Gardens looks puny. It wasn't a sale season at that time, but we found Chloe having 70% discount! My heart nearly stopped beating for a while. Thank god we found that the interesting items were not that cheap even after discount. (Branded labels are marked up much higher in Indonesia, that's why Mr. Host told us that filthy rich Indonesians hop over to Singapore for 1-day shopping trips.)

But genuine designer goods at shopping malls were NOT the main aim of this trip. Our main target were the questionable designer goods at the factory outlets in Bandung, of course. Questionable as in the goods might not even be overruns or rejects. They are just FAKES. Anyway, who cares, as long as they are of good quality & cheap.

Unfortunately, we were at Bandung during the weekends. As the town is on higher terrain & is supposedly cooler (Gohtong Jaya equivalent we were told, but hot like hell when we were there), there was quite an influx of Jakartarians, so the streets were jammed up with all types of large black Lexus and Toyota MPVs. It was a crawl everywhere.

But with the help of our 'personal driver', we still managed to cover about 10 factory outlets in Bandung (or more, I don't remember). My personal favourites were the bigger ones with better display, such as Rumah Mode, Heritage, Cascade & Summit. We were already warned beforehand that these factory outlets in Bandung are totally different from those in US, which have individual outlets for each brand. At Bandung, the goods are everywhere, so we were ready to'work hard' to find IT!

But once we found 'IT', the feeling was really high. Higher when the items are between RM10-RM30 only. Like when i found a black DKNY zip-up sweater (RM30) at the kiddy dept (which the sales assistant said was meant for young teens. Yeah, I can wear!). And this Hard Rock tee for Di-Di for only ~RM10.

Before we left, our 'personal driver' took us to Jln. Cihampelas (a.k.a. Jeans St., the origins of factory outlets). It was ah..em..different! But we did found this cool, cozy place to eat.

All in all, have a look at my personal stimulus plan.
And here goes my remaining Rp. All except Rp.1,ooo (~RM0.30) *Wonder whether I can claim rebate of 102,000 fr IRB!!!*
I'm SO going to eat grass when I'm old!!!!

Bush-like Gaffe

One fine day, Di-di asked mommy to spell 'bicycle'. (He is forever testing me though he can't tell whether I got it correctly or not.)

Mommy: B-A-S-I-C-A-L. Eh! *dun sound rite* Daddy, how to spell bicycle already ah ?

Daddy: *Give me the look* B-I-C-Y-C-L-E!!!!

DUH!!!!!!!!

P/S. Mommy hope Daddy is not having second thoughts about mommy being tuition teacher to his lil' monsters & still pays the tuition fees!!!!

Unemployment Benefit

One of the advantages of unemployment is that the boys get to enjoy the neighbourhood playground more often, instead of only on weekends.

But playground time is not as easy as it sounds. I don't get to stare into space jog around or do some exercise myself. Because they expect mommy to:-

1. Push them on the swing. Simultaneously. Which is really no joke as they will be screaming for faster & higher! Why don't they just swing by themselves u would ask ? For the life of me, I also don't get it why they don't know how, especially Kor-Kor who will be 7 soon. And I have shown them how to move their legs numerous times. Thought swinging is an inbred ability??!!


2. Playing catch-me-if-you-can around the playarea. Where mommy get to make a fool of herself.


3. Going down the covered slide. Di-di likes to lie down on top of me & we both go 'whoosh' down. This is also no joke as those covered slides are really worm holes to us. For'whoosh' effect, I need to lie down. Once I instinctly sit up & got stuck! It was really painful trying to twist my neck to a certain angle to release myself. The neck sore lasted a week.


4. Doing the 400m (or more) race around the adjacent basketball court. I would like to say that I could outrun my sons, but it's getting more & more difficult. I'm usually out flat in 2 rounds, whereas they can do more. And they recover faster, ha, ha!


5. Shooting hoops. Thank god both of them are still shorty, thus lousy at this so mommy can still awe them with a couple of shots.

My 2-minute respite will be when they go for what I call 'swing-surfing':-

I also get some rest if other kids wanna play with them, ha, ha! But sometimes they are so sweaty & dirty that other mommies look at me funnily. And their feet will go down to our family's Hall of Fame.

Lazy Translation

A couple of weeks ago, I saw this in Kor-Kor's exercise book.


And I have been cracking my head ever since. Is there no similar word in BM for jogging ? Daddy says no. But I just can't believe it - jogging is such a common word. I understand direct translation for more complicated words like innovation, inspiration, etc. But jogging???

In this case, can we also substitute other common words like...mmm, 'clubbing' ? Emak pergi berclubbing dengan bapa (Mommy went clubbing with Daddy) ?

Or 'pimping' ? Kawan saya berpimping laman saya kepada semua (My friend is pimping my web to all).

Or 'bitching'???

Ok, granted bitching and pimping are not such nice common words, but still...

I can almost hear my lil monsters enlightening the cikgu during 'bina ayat' sessions in the foreseeable future:-

Emak selalu berbitching tentang majikannya kepada kawan-kawan (Mommy is always bitching about her boss to friends).

Cikgu terpelanting! (Teacher fell off chair!)

Cheers

As we ran out of ideas to entertain the boys, Daddy took the boys to his very own 'Cheers'-where everybody knows his name! a.k.a. HIS drinking hole, last Sat nite.

One of the owners-cum-cook whipped up a mean seafood spaghetti for us. While waiting, the boys took a stab at a game of darts.



Other than Coke, they also had a tiny sip of mommy's vodka orange. Please see below for the results:-


Cheers! Here's to starting them young. Burp!!!

Mean girls 1.0

My 2 lil' monsters love indoor playgrounds such as those in Ikea.

One time, while waiting for them to wear their shoes after picking them up, I heard a mommy made this comment to her daughter.

You can never be good in ballet. Your toes are TOO long.

I nearly choke on my saliva!!!!

English No Enough

Kor-Kor got his time table during his first week. I of course don't understand since it's all in CHINESE. And since he was in no hurry to learn to pack his bag according to the timetable (he said his teacher asked to bring EVERYTHING everyday!!!), I left him be till his school bag couldn't take it anymore.

So what's a banana like me to do ? Had the timetable translated, of course! At the playground by a Std 3 neighbour's daughter, no less. There and then i started summarising his weekly lessons (with each lesson 0.5 hrs):-
Assembly (with weekly announcements. Trust me they got lots!): 1
Chinese: 12
Bahasa Malaysia: 9
Chinese Math: 6
English Math: 4
Chinese Science: 3
English Science: 3
Moral: 4
Lukisan: 2
Music: 2
P.E.: 2
Computer: 2
and last but not least English : 2.

WHAT???!!! Two lessons for English only!!! One hour a week !!!! How are they going to learn all those verb, noun, adjective, pronoun, present tense, past tense, past participle, etc, etc...with just 2 lessons a week!

No wonder students from Chinese schools are weak in English. And they'll probably get weaker now with only 2 lessons left. Hello...we need FOCUS la...Science and Math in English OR Chinese (or other mother tongue). Choose. Then, more time can be placed for proper English lessons la...

Or else our children will grow up spitting out this kind of English:



Pay note to line no 2 (eg will given; kind operation). HUH? And i can't begin to tell u what's wrong with line 4...

This is a school extra-curricular notice, mind you!

To Meddle or Not to Meddle

As this mommy was out of work, this mommy punched card at Kor-Kor's school every recess for the first week. To make sure Kor-Kor tucks in his shirt. To find out what's cooking at the canteen. To learn the prices so that Kor-Kor won't be able to bullshit mommy. To peek at what food other kids are bringing. To spy on what other parents are doing for their kids. Most of all, to send telepathy messages to the class teacher to reshuffle the seating arrangement!

Kor-Kor complained after the second day that his naughty neighbour pulled his hand down & refuse to let him volunteer for an answer. My son is no saint, I know. When he was 4, he was punished to stand in the corner almost everyday. When he was 5, his teacher put him to sit with the girls so that he would be better behave & it worked.

I know I really shouldn't butt in. I read somewhere that parents shouldn't try to solve every problems for their kids. How then do they get to practise on their problem-solving skills. Plus the teacher looked stress out. And she hadn't reshuffle the seating arrangement like the other classes yet.

After refraining myself for 4 days, hurray! Saw Kor-Kor sit beside a new boy on Fri. Well, that boy doesn't look like he stand a chance against my lil' monster. Phew! So now cross fingers, Kor-Kor behaves himself well enough so that his neighbour's mommy don't complain about him!

Besides that, also noted:-
1. Kor-Kor was lousy at tucking in his shirt...
2. The canteen food did not look appetising...
3. Considering the quality, prices were ok. Drinks are quite expensive eg Vitagen cost RM1 each.
4. Some bring enough food to feed a trucker.
5. Some parents stalked outside their child's class for a week. Some watched helplessly as their kid slept & drooled. One dad made a movie of his girl sitting in class for entire week! Some mommies discussed the benefit of starting tuition-all lessons (Then what's the point of going to school???).

Me ? Kor-Kor asked to "Can It, Mommy!" (or was it beat it ???)

First Day of School

Jan 5 (Mon)was a monstrous day. It was Di-Di's FIRST DAY at kindie. I can't believe my baby is so grown up already. I had been grilling him that i would be leaving him there, expect some trouble. But hey, guess what, he just kissed me goodbye. Byeeee, mommieee!!! Aisehman, mommy wanted at least a tear or 2 as evidence that he would miss me, BUT no such luck!

It was also Kor-Kor's FIRST DAY at national school, a Sekolah Jenis Kebangsaan Cina. Boy, what a cultural shock (for mommy)! So many dwarfs running around with their parents in tow. Just to give an idea, there were 15 Primary 1 classes, ~45 students a class. That's ~675 Primary 1 students. Add another ~675 Primary 2 and ~450 odd Primary 3 (200 less as these creme of the crop has the privilege of attending morning session). Then add the parents, siblings, grandparents, maids...it's like Isetan on the first day of sale, except there's nothing to buy!

As Kor-Kor was darn cool only, Mommy decided to make herself scarce during assembly. Must make way for other mommies trying to worm their way nearer to their sons/daughters mah. Don't they realise that they are breathing into their children's oxygen. But thank god for those blow fans!

Mommy went to school again during recess to show Kor-Kor some moral support. Eck! Kor-Kor is sitting next to the naughty boy from playground. Sucks! But surely the class teacher is going to reshuffle. Yeah, let's wait. No need to interfere right away, rite ? May be the boy's mommy also thought my lil' monster is a rascal & ban her boy from sitting next to Kor-Kor. Yeah, rite!

As I'm not into the 'wait outside classroom' thing, I came back just before school ends to make sure Kor-Kor knows which car to get into. Kor-Kor looked a bit dazed. Also didn't know how to tuck in his shirt. Sucks! Why we never thought about teaching him that. Oh ya, it's now in fashion NOT to tuck in the tees.

But overall, a successful day...NO COMPLAINTS from either of them! Well, maybe except 1:-
Kor-Kor: "Why this school so long one ? Morning go, nite come back...."
Mommy: "Huh ? Oh no la, starts in the afternoon, ends evening la!!!" [Kids! Exaggeration! (*roll eyes*)]

25 Things About..Samseng Kia

Now here's some juicy stories abt my samseng boys...all 25 things:-

1. They love pork, but 'siew yuk' better than 'char siew'.
2. They also love McD.
3. Kor-kor (big bro) used to be a cry baby, thank god he outgrew it.
4. Di-Di (small bro) came out an angel, a survival instinct (our theory) that he knew he would have to compete with his big bro whom mommy was giving 130%!
5. Both of them like to run barefoot around the neighbourhood playground. They have checked with their feet, so no, there's no sharps objects there...
6. Kor-Kor's current ambition is to be a policeman, mommy says 'no way' (cringe)!
7. Di-Di is currently going on & on.. & on.. & on.. with 'Hey Diddle Diddle' & 'Simple Simon'...Irritatingly cute!
8. Their current craze is Ben 10 (which boy age 3 to 10 is not!), so mommy gotta know all Aliens' name also....a pre-requisite..
9. They are best of pals now, mommy pray very hard they stay that way.
10. Kor-Kor drinks water from his milk bottle upto close to 6 yrs old (we called it his shame-shame bottle). Then mommy went for a holiday with galpals, and daddy CUT IT AWAY.
11. Di Di self taught himself to drink from cup since 1+. Also, self taught, take off clothes, wear clothes, wear socks....(c told ya, he's an angel, fr this aspect)
12. They think having a flying vacation (that involve aeroplane) every year is 'yin tak' ie their entitlement. Boy!
13. Kor-kor walks like his grand-daddy...a distinct shuffle...
14. Di-Di is choosy of what he wears since 3. He's very 'Ai sui'!
15. He's also a picky eater. He has fetish for 'fei yuk' (the fats in meat), fish & chicken skin...calls it gummy-gummy!
16. Kor-Kor eats more like a Penangite...loves char koay teow, penang rojak (buah) & laksa.
17. Daddy bribed Kor-Kor a PS2 to sleep by himself in his own room when he was 6. It worked for Kor-Kor but no chance against Di-Di, thus Di-Di still sleeps with Mommy & still kicks Daddy off the bed!
18. Both of them can climb almost anything...like the top of slides, etc...genes fr mommy side of family.
19. Both of them are bananas...ie yellow skin, but don't speak any Chinese dialects!
20. Kor-Kor is anti-social, Di-di is very sociable...he would kiss practically anyone.
21. Kor-Kor was placed with a babysitter who also nanny a few others till he was 4, thus he can give & take gracefully most times. Di-Di needs more training in that area.
22. Both of them have more toys than they need.
23. Both of them have more DVDs than they should.
24. Sometimes at nite, we pillow-fight & they'll be so out-of-breath that they vomit! (Daddy dunno..sshhh!)
25. They still think their mommy is d coolest...(wander how long would that last) !
    

(At the time of press...Kor-Kor is ~6.5, Di-Di is ~3.4 yrs old. They probably beat me up when they older, but hey, how else can i remember...)

25 Things About Me

I first saw 25 Things in FB. Thot it will be a fun debut blog. Here's my stab at it (more difficult that i realised):-

1. I can't parallel park...unless the 2 other spaces at the sides are empty!
2. I'm tone-deaf, can't sing to save my life...
3. I also have 2 left feet. Would love to get that corrected, if surgically possible.
4. My only talent is I can tell....whether the pregnancy is a boy or girl. Most of the time...
5. I am most fidgety when...i have to stand in line. I normally feel like yelling at the serving party if i have to wait for more than 10 minutes!
6. I have excellent memory (my friends call it elephant memory, god knows why!)....unfortunately about silly, trivial matters....like what my significant half promised me a decade ago, er, no wait, that's IMPORTANT stuff!!!!!
7. I don't eat goat, cow & lamb meat. And for the last time....it's NOT a religious thing. Don't like it, that's all.
8. I don't have a good taste bug. Once was tucking in heartily at a tibetan mo-mo (steamboat) until friends voiced out that it smelt like pee!
9. Nothing attracts me more faster than a 'SALE' sign!
10. Am not a social butterfly. Won't approach a person to break the ice...unless i know the person is from Penang &/or speaks Hokkien!
11. I'm not a morning person. Try not to talk to me before 10.
12. I'm a coffee-holic. I would be yawning, agitated bitch addict if i dun have at least a strong cup a day.
13. Have forgotten to zip up my pants a few times & didn't realise till i reached work! FYI, I used to take public transport!
14. Was molested twice in public transport & once in cinema. Was so engrossed with movie that didn't realise the uncle's hand was on my lap. Ew!
15. Thinks that having four kids would be ideal. Come to think of it, i recently look at pregnant ladies with ENVY again!!! (my hubby would freak out if he knows!)
16. Loves adventure holidays & was once inspired to climb Everest Base Camp (only kaki bukit, not the entire mountain, I'm definitely not that ambitious, he, he) Still dreaming...
17. During my late teens, didn't know i was on a group date till the boy called to tell me he missed me! That's me, Blur-blur!
18. Is guilty of taking a yearly holiday (or two) with gal pals & fib to sons that trip(s) are for work!
19. Have taken up reading a few books at same time. Cannot parallel park but at least, can parallel read!
20. Kinda thinks the fish monger near my place looks kinda cute!!!
21. Like to steal her sons Yakult to drink late at nite. And chocolate. Ice cream sometimes...
22. Is pretty bad at spring cleaning...thus, my closet looks like the bottom of the Bermuda Triangle.
23. Is not a touche feelly person, very, very awkward in doing hug hug kiss kiss!!
24. Is blessed to have BFFs whom I've known since 11.
25. Last but not least, I'm terrified most of... losing my lil' monsters! Not just literally, also to puberty as they'll probably think it's not cool to hang out with mommy anymore, sob, sob!